Won't Apologize
by wheezes wizard weasleys
Summary: She wasn’t going to use her age-old tactic. The “Remember that time when I said I was sorry?” Why? Easy. She wasn’t. NALEX; DRABBLE


**A/N: **So… I'm writing a sad one-shot. Really not my thing, I'm always writing where the couple ends up happy on fanfic. My stories in real life tend to be more sad, though, and I just felt sick at all the sickly sweet writing, you know? Because I don't think happy endings come by often. This is NOT a songfic, but it IS based of Selena's "I Won't Apologize". But it may seem even more depressing then I intended it to be, because… I was listening to We are Broken by Paramore. And that song is beautiful, but terribly sad. To be honest, I always do the first author's note before the story, so, erm, I don't know how this will turn out. We'll just have to see. OH. And go on you tube and listen to "We are Broken". It's so beautiful. /goes to listen to it again while writing PARAMORE IS MY MUSE

**Name of Story: **I Won't Apologize

**Summary: **She wasn't going to use her age-old tactic. The "Remember that time when I said I was sorry?" Why? Easy. She wasn't. NALEX; DRABBLE

**Genre: **Romance/Angst

**Pairings: **Nalex – but it is sad, I'll admit it right now. It's not a happy Nalex. It's kind of angsty, actually. And as much as I love Nate, he doesn't come out as a good guy here.

**Rating: **K

_**OH. MY. JONAS.**_

It was anger. A spark of anger. He could see it, she could feel it. Always, she'd been told you could see emotions flickering through her eyes. "Alex," he rasped, his own brown eyes flickering with life and defiance. "Alex," he repeated again, eyes suddenly pleading. If her eyes were the key to her heart, what were his? They said a million more things. It was something she always pondered. Now, though, she didn't want to ponder it.

Her normal sarcastic mood refused to let her just sit there while he spewed out her name so innocently, as if he hadn't hurt her a thousand times, just like she'd hurt him. "What? Are you just going to say my name?" she taunted, eyes narrowing.

They'd always been the perfect couple, you know. Well, that's what people _said_. They both had brown hair and brown eyes, the hair very dark, eyes medium shaded and dancing with life. She was an inch or two shorter then him, and it was as if she was meant to be curled up under his arm, smiling up at him while he gazed adoringly at her. In public, they were perfect, sweet, innocent, and, above all, loved each other.

Love. She scoffed at the word now. It wasn't love – in fact, she doubted love was real. If he loved her, he wouldn't have cheated on her. If he loved her, he wouldn't try to get her to change who she was. If he loved her… her heart thumped, aching. No. If this was love, she didn't want to be part of it. In fact, she'd rather go back to being the Ice Queen of New York. She'd rather be … anything but this, really. Who would ask for this pain that she'd gotten? As if she'd just been rammed over, like Meghan's mom in Dance Flick? People who loved where fools.

"Alex," he murmured. "You could apologize to me – you were just kissing some… guy! We're in love, Alex," he muttered, desperate. "We can start over," he said rashly. "I'll forget it, just… just say sorry. Please?" So he could go behind her back _again? _She didn't think so.

"Just say sorry," he pleaded again.

He should know that she never said sorry. Sorry was, seemingly, just not in her vocabulary. And she didn't plan on adding it, either. In fact, right then and there, she decided something. Something important. She wasn't going to use her age-old tactic. The "Remember that time when I said I was sorry?" Why? Easy. She wasn't. She wasn't sorry for going behind his back.

He deserved it. Everyone knew she was a revenge-lover.

And now? Now she was pissed off. In fact, she never remembered being this angry in her life. It was as if this were a comic, and one panel was just red. Red, red, red. That's all she could see before she blew.

"_You want me to apologize?!_" she shrieked. She didn't care if the entire world heard her – in fact, she hoped they did! "You've been trying to change me since the moment we met, Nate Gray, and I was sick and tired of it," she spat out at him. "And you need to get something through your idiotic head _right this instant. _I am not sorry! You cheated on me, you filthy… words aren't even bad enough to describe you!" she shrieked.

Nate stumbled back. "I did NOT change you!" This was it. Her breathing hitched as they drew closer. Heart thudding, bodies pressed together, raw anger just passing between them. She was glad she was getting to him, she was glad he felt at least some of the anger she felt.

"If I'm sorry for anything," Alex spat, "It's that I changed for you! I'm sorry that I believed you!" It was so hot as the two glared daggers at one another, faces mere centimeters apart.

"I did not make you change, Alexandra Russo," Nate hissed. "_You _changed! Things didn't have to be this way, Alex! And I bet you anything that when this is over, you'll go around pretending that we never dated, that none of this happened!"

Ooh, she was angry. She was on fire, and she loved every second of it. It felt so good to feel this energy again, something she hadn't felt for the longest time. Her veins held blood that had to be hotter then it was supposed to be. They were thunder and lightening – meant to be together, but couldn't stand one another. "You know what, Nathaniel Gray?" Alex mocked, and he grit his teeth. "I don't want to fit exactly under your arm! I don't want us to look perfect next to each other! Because this thing that you're trying to say is a relationship **is not perfect!** And I am _sick _and _tired _of people saying it is!"

They pressed harder against one another, foreheads now touching. "You," he breathed, "are horrible. I hate that you are my so-called 'perfect match'! I hate you, Alex! I hate everything about you! I hate that you have this damn power over me, I hate that you look perfect with me, I hate that you cheated on me! I hate that your always gorgeous, I hate how my brothers always tell me I'm so damn lucky when I'm not! I am NOT LUCKY! Because we aren't perfect together; we are horrible!" She couldn't agree more. But they knew what would happen next. They hated that it would happen, but they couldn't stop.

His lips crashed down on hers, her hands twined into his curly locks, and if anyone saw them, standing in Alex's room, they'd see the raw passion. They'd think it was love.

The two knew better.

She broke away, gasping deeply while he gazed at her with confusing eyes. He looked so lustful, but he looked like he hated her like no other, too. It was the oddest combination, but she knew she felt the same way.

"Just say you're sorry," he whispered, lips brushing against hers as he spoke. "Please…"

Alex gulped. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm sorry for changing, and … and that everything turned out this way." She cringed, burying her head in his shoulders. "I'm so, so, sorry, Nate. But it's easier this way, and it's going to get better, I promise. Maybe we should just pretend. But I refuse to apologize to you for being me, Nathaniel."

He pulled back then, and she could see the raw pain, anger, and hurt flashing through his eyes. There "perfect love" was over… it was dead, it was gone, and both them were relieved and horrified about it.

She hated him. He hated her.

She loved him. He loved her. But they knew this wouldn't happen, not again. They'd had their shot, they'd messed it up.

_**OH. MY. JONAS.**_

**A/N: **Not really what I expected, but I kind of like it. I know the emotions are all over the place, but if you think about it, that's kind of how relationships are. In case you didn't catch on, Nate cheated on Alex, and Alex cheated on Nate. Alex cheating on Nate occurred right before this argument, and it was because she was mad. Just in case you're confused. It's not my best work, and next time I look over it I'll probably hate it, but that's what writers do. They demolish half of there stuff, usually without pity. But I'm just going to keep this up here, because I need to get through my writer's block eventually.

Drop a review, even if you hated it, please. And if you're going to flame, could you make it funny? Recently, I've had some really bad days, and I'm not feeling so hot, so something funny would be nice, even if you did hate it. You can just be like "Ooh, Bella, this sucked. But you know what? BANANAS!" Random things make me smile. Or just leave me some joke – I laugh at almost everything. Sorry, getting off topic. Well, review, or I shall send my flying man-eating monkeys after you! Nomnomnomnom!


End file.
